So I stayed quiet yesterday and I was gonna not say anything at all about this, but after seeing all the cheering (along with bashing Christians) and the bashing from so called Christians I feel I must address something on my feed.
I am all for Equality. I believe everyone should be treated equal no matter what. Your life style is your business. As long as you aren't harming anyone (truly harming) then live your life how you see fit. If you wanna have sex with your Goat by all means have fun, but don't expect me to join in or even be around when you do that. But please respect my right to have my opinion. The reason I feel the need to write this is because on both sides I've seen in the last 24 hours someone (more then one someone) state if you aren't with me your against me and that makes you the enemy. These are the same people that were shouting not 48 hours ago that there shouldn't be a race card. That everyone is equal. So forgive me if I'm confused. You are only for Equality if it fits your agenda?
1. We are the land of the right to choose whatever religion we want
2. We are the land to love who ever we want
3. We are the land of you can be whoever you wanna be as long as you work hard and put forth an effort.
4. We are the land of many opportunities.
5. We are the land of a bunch of Hypocrites
6. We are the land of If you don't believe in my Religion, Political Agenda then Fuck you.
7. We are the land of if you aren't my race, if you don't like the same sex I do then Fuck you.
Do you see where this is going? All it takes is one Whisper to turn into a roar either good or bad. All it takes is one bad thing to ruin a tremendous amount of good things. But it takes a shit ton of good for it to dent the bad. What is wrong with you people? Yes there are bad people out there that are Extremists, but mostly it's just every day people trying to handle their own shit. People keep jumping on what ever band wagon is popular at the moment.
It takes just one person to change the world. Truly it does. I know you've read or heard me before, but we in my household are trying to be that person. We are teaching the boys to love everyone. To forgive (because holding grudges just breeds negativity) but not forget. To not see the color of ones skin, but see the soul inside. We don't judge anyone and everyone who wants to start something can stay away. There are plenty of things people in my life do and I scratch my head and think to myself, what the hell were they thinking. But I do not blast them on FB, I don't degrade them in front of our peers. I may pull them to the side and go, "Okay, what the hell is going on?" And at the end I may still not understand, but at the end of the day it's not my life. I try and support/guide if I can. Somethings I just have no knowledge of and I can't do anything but be the ear that listens. As long as it doesn't harm me or mine have yourself a merry time.
But understand this people who believe the whole if you aren't with me your against me crap you are your own worst enemy. You are showing more intolerance then anyone else. You are giving them more reason to say, "See why should I be tolerant, they aren't." Be the bigger person. I understand you have to stand up and fight for what you believe, but that doesn't give you the right to be ugly if I don't agree with you.
Say I was a Die hard follow the Bible Christian. That is my right. It is my right to not agree with the new Marriage Equality Law. It is within my right to say it is wrong and goes against my religion. IF I am a Die hard Lesbian who doesn't believe in the Bible, that is well within my rights to disagree with a Bible thumping Christian. But that doesn't give either one right to bash the other. You each have an opinion which should and can be discussed civilly.
Just because you are this race doesn't give you the right to bash that race. I'm sorry our country was founded on Slavery, but if you read your history correctly it wasn't just Africans that were sold into Slavery. The Irish were treated a lot the same way. Some giving their lives up for servitude to live in the US and not in their home country. But to keep harping on something that happened more then 100 years ago and to keep blaming people of today is wrong. That is my write to say that. We have Blackfeet Indian running through our veins but you don't see my raising cane and causing scenes over what was done.
You can't change the past, but you can change the future. Once voice, one random act of kindness, one person can change the world. Not all Peach colored (I'm sorry I'm not white) people are bigots and against Darker colored people. Not all Darker Skinned people are against Peach skinned people. Not all Christians are against the LGBT community. Not all LGBT hate Christians. But until we set it all aside and just be nice to everyone there will be hate and discontent and just plain Rage. Are there people out there that hate some group or religion, yes. But that's not everyone.
Just remember EVERYONE has a right to their OWN OPINION! We do still live in a Free Country (at the moment).
No I am not a professional blogger, this is my personal one. So there are spelling errors and Grammer errors, but I don't care. :D Much love to all.
Saturday, June 27, 2015
Wednesday, June 3, 2015
A Rant on my Soapbox
As with most of my blogs, let me say that there will probably be spelling & grammar errors. I might make some of you mad. But as we live with free will, my opinions are my opinions. I'm allowed to have a different one then you. As you don't have to agree with me, you can have your own opinion. Please understand though, just because we have different opinions doesn't me I have the right to force mine down your throat or you to force yours down mine. I'm all for a great discussion as long as that's what it is. No bashing, no name calling, no religion thumping and no shoving it down my throat. This is just a small portion of what goes on in my head... Please bear with me.
I've read a lot in the last 48 hours about Bruce Jenner/Caitlyn Jenner. How she's a Hero, How she's not a hero, How he will always be a he, How he and everyone like him is going to hell. And the list goes on and on. As someone who is friends with a number of the Transgender community she has taken the steps many of these people would like to take to become the person they are inside. It is not for anyone to Judge. (I know as a majority Homosapiens will judge) Yes, if you believe in the bible it does state (not exact words) to show the lost the path. What it does not say is to shove that path down our throats and make us feel like we are worth nothing. Everyone is entitled to an opinion and has the right to express that opinion, but not the right to be hatefully or hurtful with it.
I have fought with my "religion" all my life. Trying to figure out if I fit into any of the hundreds of religions out there. I've been to many different "churches" and never seemed to fit into any given one. I even thought for a while there I found a "Home" but in the end I still felt like I didn't belong there and moved on. As of this moment I believe there is a Big Man up there, but I have a very hard time with any organized religion. Now that portion being said, I believe in equal rights for every HOMOSAPIEN. I don't care if you are male, female, black, white, gay, straight, transgender or whatever. I do not think it is our place to judge anyone. That is between the person and their maker. Their maker is the one who will judge in the end.
I believe that there a many types of Hero's in this world. You don't have to wear a uniform to be a Hero. Just many that do wear them are. I believe Bruce/Caitlyn Henner is a Hero for the Transgender Community. This is a step in the right direction for them. Hopefully a step towards acceptance. I think it's funny how in today's society there is still a race card, but have you ever noticed no matter what race everyone "hates" the LGBT Community. This will be a never ending battle until People learn it is not our place to judge. But again, some will always judge. It is Homosapien nature.
I Very MUCH SUPPORT our LGBT Community. But please understand as long as you aren't hurting people I pretty much support. In my household we are teaching our children to accept everyone based on the person they are on the inside. Not the color of their skin, their religion, or who the have sex with or love. A person is a person. People also make mistakes and for those that are truly trying to atone for the mistakes and become a better person then they deserve a second chance. Our home is Sanctuary. For those of our friends in need, who need help. Once you step foot on our property you put aside all your hate or prejudices aside and we are just family!
So this rant has gone all over the place and if you have been able to follow it great if not then oh well. But the bottom line is EVERYONE should be treated EQUAL No Matter what!
For my Ohana reading this I LOVE ALL OF YOU!
Sunday, March 22, 2015
A little Bit about us
It’s been almost 3 years since I wrote a blog. I’m going to try and get back into writing at
least once a month, if not once a week. There
have been a lot of changes in our lives in 3 years. So I’m going to start this Blog off with
background on myself and my family for those that may come across it and go um….what
in the world. LOL! Please understand this is not a professional
blog, so I have spelling and grammer errors.
At the time of writing this exact blog I am 34 years old. My husband and I have been together for 8
years this year and married 5 of those.
We have 8 Children we call ours though not all of them are ours by
blood. Coming into our relationship my
husband had 3 girls he called his own (and they called him dad) for years even
though he was not their biological father.
He dated their mother and when the relationship went south he stayed in
contact with the girls. Our youngest
girl (who is now 21) at the time had a best friend that we “adopted” into our family. Even though she lives in another state now
she is still one of ours. I came into
our marriage with our oldest son, whom I had in a previous marriage. We were quite content with the lot we
had. But the Big Person upstairs had
other plans. In March of 2010 we had our
Mack. He spent 6 days in the NICU because
they didn’t like the way he was breathing, but that is for a different blog
entry. In Dec of 2010 Daniel and I got
married. That month we also found out we
were having another baby. Talk about a
shocker. But wait it gets better. In Jan of 2011 we found out we were having
not one, but two. Yes you read that
correctly. We were having twins. I will not lie, I was scared out of my
mind. I mean holy rusted metal Batman…. here
we were at the time with a 6 soon to be 7 year old and a not even 1 year old
and now we were having twins. Oh my Daleks
(as we say in our house)!! Again I’m not
gonna lie I prayed for boys. We already
had two and I’m a tomboy. I had no clue
what I’d do with a girl, let alone two. Well my prayers were answered and I was
carrying two boys. At the end of June 2011
my father in law’s blood sugar sky rocketed and he had an episode that landed
him in the hospital and we thought for sure we were going to lose him. He was in a coma for roughly a month. On July 17, 2011 I went in to Labor and
Delivery and told them the boys were coming.
Since I was only 32 weeks they attempted to stop my labor. My husband, was running between my room and
his fathers room which were a floor apart.
On July 18, 2011 Malachi and Killian made their grand entrance into the
world. This would be 2 days before my
father in law and his twin sister were to celebrate their birthdays. Within
days my father in law woke up and is still alive today.
This was the start of where we are today. It was with the birth of our twins that has
taught me it truly takes a village to raise a child. Our family has grown so much since Daniel and
I started dating in 2007. We don’t just
have our children, we have those we call family. You’ll see in this blog that we are teaching
our children to love based on what is on the inside, not the outside. Our home has become Sanctuary to many. When you come on our property you leave all
the BS and drama behind. You don’t have
to worry what people will think. We don’t
judge. Now we may look at you and go, “What
in the Sam Hell were you thinking?” But it
will be said with a hug and love and possibly a punch to the shoulder. One of our motto’s comes from the movie
Stitch and when we first started using it we were a little family.
“This is my family. I found it all on my own. It's little, and
broken, but still good. Yeah - still good.”
We still use that one, though we are not a little family
any more. We also use:
“Ohana means family, and Family means nobody
gets left behind.. or forgotten”
In my blog you will see me talk about many things and many
people. A lot will revolve around my
Family. Our family has everyone from
Church Goers to Pot Smokers. Tattooed
and Non Tattooed. Gays, Straights,
Lesbians and Transgenders. Black, Asian,
Latino, Scottish, Heinz 57 mixed mutts.
We have young and old. Our family
is who loves us and us them.
A few notes to help you further understand us:
Many of our family are Whovians.
We cosplay.
We are geeks and very proud of it.
We swear, drink and most of us own guns.
While yes I believe in the Big Person upstairs I am
beginning to understand I don’t really fit into any religion (A Blog for
another day).
So please, love us or hate us. Read my blog or don’t. But maybe just maybe it will help someone understand
themselves a little better.
I can’t wait to get started on what I hope is the first of
many Blogs to come.
Tuesday, September 18, 2012
Not even sure how to title this
I have sat here for days and typed and deleted, typed and deleted and typed and deleted this blog. The reason being I would start out fairly southern, but sure enough 1/2 through it my northern side would rear it's ugly head and crap, obviously not calm enough to write this.
So hopefully with this try over a week later I'll be able to sit and write everything I need to say. Now remember as always these are my opinions and I have the right to them. You have the right to like them or not like them. If you are of a mind you have the right to not read my blog and get bent. I have decided that I'm 32 years old and truthfully sick of all the crap that is still going on 14 years after high school ended. I get that everyone (and I mean everyone) has drama in their lives, but when you cause most of your own drama I have no sympathy. I am probably going to piss people off and I might even lose some friendships but if you can't handle my opinion of things than obviously we weren't friends to begin with. I AM NOT POINTING FINGERS at anyone I'm just stating things I see and it's a combination of years and years of frustration over some things. I will also limit the names I do use for I know they will not care that I've used them, but if I have not used a name, please respect the fact that I haven't used a name and don't mention any names. If you do, I will DELETE the comment.
For the record I am not perfect, hell I'm probably the farthest thing from it so don't think that with this blog I am saying I am perfect and everyone else is not. Let me explain things so everyone knows what is going on in this household, that way no one can say I'm passing judgement from my perfect palace.
Just because I don't talk about it or post it on facebook all the time doesn't mean I don't have my bad days. Since the twins came along I have struggled with a small bout of depression. I've never experienced this before and at first didn't understand what was going on. It took until just 4 or 5 months ago for me to come to terms with what is going on. Because we make a hair too much money for state assistance in insurance, but not enough to actually get insurance any other way, I am without it. So instead of borrowing money from my parents to go to the doctor, my fabulous husband and our friend Jacob, have taken on the brunt of my frustrations. They have held me up and held me tight through horrible crying fits that I thought I would surely break into a million pieces from. Remember please I am a strong person and for me this is unacceptable. I do everything I can to not have these in front of our children, because I do not want them to be effected by this in any way. I know that at least my oldest understand that I am going through something, but I do not think the little ones have a clue. I hope they don't anyways, please let me have my delusions. Now, where it has effected my children is the fact that I did not want to go anywhere and I did not want to do anything. I wanted to sit here and be in my own little bubble. The problem with this is that means I have no face to face time with adults. So I am with just my children all day every day. As most of you especially stay at home moms know, our job is 24/7 and is 365 days a year. There is no sick time, no vacations. So in combination with being depressed, slowly I was going insane too I think. Again all this was happening and I didn't understand it until about 4-5 months ago. Never in all that time did I think about ending my life or that of my children. I just wanted to scream and cry and be held by the people who love me most.
Now that we/I understand what I am going through we have been working to get me better and all this without the help of meds and doctors. (NOT BASHING ANYONE WHO IS ON MEDS OR GOES TO THE DOCTOR) Hopefully this will help you understand why I don't have the time or energy to deal with some of the crap I read, heard and seen on a daily bases.
So let us begin with my Soapbox:
1. If you complain there is never enough money and either you or your spouse or you and your spouse don't work (and there is no legitimate medical or mental reason for not working) get off your lazy ass and find a freaking job. I'm sorry it might not be your "DREAM" job, but GOOD LORD it's a damn job. So you are flipping burgers or working behind a counter at a gas station you are providing for yourself or your family. Get over yourself. When you have a family to feed and provide for NOTHING should be beneath you. So what if you have to work 2-3 jobs. You choose to have a family no get off your ass and provide for them. At the moment Daniel is not working his butt off at both jobs, but we've noticed that it looks like we need some income coming in from that 2nd job. So he will go back to working 45 hours or more at job 1 and than go to job 2 and work 20-40 hours there. Meaning we at the house wont see him. I'll be back to putting everyone to bed by myself most nights and doing shower time with just my oldest and I. It's gonna be tough, but we can do it. We will make it through this like we have everything else in life. Does Daniel want to do this, no. He enjoys spending time with his family, but he UNDERSTANDS what it means to take care of his family.
2. If you complain there is never enough money, but you are constantly going out or buying new things I have NO SYMPATHY for you. Ever once in a while splurging is one thing, but when you are going out 3-5 times a week or every weekend there is an issue. If you buy something that is wanted but not needed at that time and than don't have money for your bills, there is an issue. Again the every once in awhile splurging is different. If you don't have the money to put gas in your car at the end of the week, but you have been out and about ever day doing nothing but being out of the house, NO SYMPATHY. We grounded the van for a full week and a half and I went no where I didn't absolutely have to go because we knew we weren't gonna have the extra cash.
3. I'm not sorry for my opinion on this one, but sorry it may hurt feelings. If you put your schooling before you providing for your family. What I mean by this, is instead of working to provide for your family and doing school around that to better yourself. When because you are going to school full time the only income you are getting is from your loans and state assistance and you don't have enough money to feed your children, or pay your light bill or rent and you complain about it, I have NO SYMPATHY. I understand the need to better yourself, so you can provide better for your children. BUT, that should never come before making sure they are feed and provided for.
4. My oldest father is not in the picture, he lives in a different state and has had no face to face contact with him since he was 6 weeks old, no phone contact with him since he was 3-4 years old and no email/facebook/myspace, snail mail contact since he was probably 5 years old. No birthday or Christmas cards or presents since 3-4. Some months child support comes in, some months it doesn't. I don't ever count on that money though, because the minute I do I stop getting it. I try to spend 25% on things my oldest wants. The rest I use to help pay bills for the house or with sport activities. I have no need for my ex husband and I am sure he feels the same about me, but I NEVER BASH HIM in front of or around or where my oldest might see it. All it does is make you look like an idiot later in life. If your other parent is a first class loser, let your children find out on their own and just be there for them. Also never assume you know all the facts going on in your ex's life. They are an ex for a reason and your probably aren't involved in all the information.
5. If you have a parent (dad or mom) that wants to be involved in the kids life, unless there is a damn good reason let them be. No offense women, you have a dad that is willing to pay child support and willing to split custody and WANTS to spend time with their child(ren) why would you not let them? All that will cause if for your child later in life to realize that it is you that wouldn't let them go see their dad. Vice verse for Dad's with a mom (Though it's not nearly as common).
6. If you keep popping kids out and you can't afford or handle the ones you currently have, NO SYMPATHY! Get over yourselves. There are families out there that want children and can afford them, but can't have them. Here you are, 1,2,5,10 children later, living (not assisted) off the state and you can't figure out what causes it. USE A DAMN CONDOM OR GET SOME BIRTH CONTROL! Better yet get FIXED! After we had our 2nd child we decided Daniel would get fixed. Well the money was never there and I didn't know you could get help through the health clinic if you qualified for it. We decided that our income tax of 2011 would be used to make that happen. Well the big man upstairs decided that we weren't done and blessed us with our youngest two, the twins. Let me tell you something at 5 months pregnant Daniel went and snip snip we weren't having any more children. But I'd rather be safe than sorry so I went and had myself done also. If we get pregnant now there better a star in the sky and three wise men with lots of gold headed my way. NOW.... that being said, we currently have a friend who went in and did the same thing I did and hers didn't take. That is a different situation. I get some religions don't believe in Birth control of any type, well than understand that I hope the state stops helping you. I know that may be cruel, but up until our 2nd child I worked 40-60 hours a week and paid my taxes and did all that junk, I don't want to pay for you to sit on your butt because you have to many children and can't afford daycare now. I don't care what age you are either. If you can't afford or handle your current children, may you should think about getting fixed. Just saying.
7. Now to all you people that LIVE OFF OUR SYSTEM (if it isn't a valid reason) I'd like to smack the hell out of you! The system is there to help people. Now partially I blame the government because they've let it get this far. But mostly I blame the people that are to damn lazy to work. Please understand that we have/do and might have to again in the near future get food stamps and WIC and medicaid for the kids. But remember Daniel works 50-90 hours a week and we are still in need of assistance. There is the difference. I hope that they go to drug testing. I think it would do a lot of good. 90% of the work force has to pee in a cup to get a job, than we should have to pee in a cup to get the assistance. It should be completely random and it should be done while on assistance too. Just because you passed the one at application, doesn't mean anything. They should randomly call you and say you need to be here by 2pm today and if you don't show we suspend your assistance. Hello if you aren't working than you should be able to find your way up there to do this. Hello it's called a bus if you have no car.
8. I hate election years and especially this year. MY PERSONAL OPINION we are damned either way. I haven't decided if I'm gonna vote or not. I understand we have had many many men and women who have died to give me that right, but I also have the right to not vote. If I don't vote, THAN I HAVE NO RIGHT TO BITCH LATER! That goes for anyone. If you don't vote, don't bitch! If you are unable to vote because you are a felon still your fault don't bitch!
9. I have my own religious beliefs and the Big Man Upstairs and I talk on a pretty good basis. Just because I do not see something the same way you do doesn't mean I am wrong. Everyone comes away with what the Big Man wants them too. We could each read a Bible verse and God could work in 2 different ways to explain it to us, depending on what we have going on in our lives. Personally I think there is ONE GOD up there and everyone just worships him in different ways. If you don't believe in him at all, remember you still believe in that and that's something. I've heard two things lately that made me pause and I hope they make you pause too...
A. If your right and I'm wrong than I just believed something whole heartily and no harm no fowl. But, if I'm right and your wrong you burn in what ever eternal hell will happen.
B. To fight the whole if you can't see, touch or smell it, it isn't real. Can you touch your brain? Can you see your brain (machine seen doesn't count)? Can you smell it? Truthfully can you feel it? NO you can't. So does that mean it's not there? Family members that are overseas fighting for our country that we can't see, touch, sometimes hear... are they not real than? Food for thought. I'm not gonna get to much into this.
Just remember the Bible was written by man and while God is perfect Man is not. So who is to say that some of these things weren't written by a man on the rag having a bad week? Or the "Devil" had a hand on him. Lead a good life, help others and believe and personally I think you'll be fine. By a good life I don't mean perfect.
10. I try not to judge anyone without hearing their side first, but when all you do is moan and complain and whine about the WOE IS ME AND MY LIFE, I just don't have sympathy any more. If you aren't going to get off your butt and do something about it, don't complain about it.
Now that I have probably pissed some people off and made others wonder if they truly want to remain friends I'm going to close with this. If you are my friend than I want you to and I love each and everyone of you, but that doesn't mean I agree with all your bullshit and it doesn't mean I wont say things you aren't going to like. Remember I AM NOT PERFECT! I have done my fair share of things that I probably shouldn't have. But we learn from our mistakes. Sometimes it just takes more than one mistake. My blog may not be perfect and there are probably spelling errors and the wording might not be right, but there it is.
Be blessed all my friends and family in whatever you may do.
So hopefully with this try over a week later I'll be able to sit and write everything I need to say. Now remember as always these are my opinions and I have the right to them. You have the right to like them or not like them. If you are of a mind you have the right to not read my blog and get bent. I have decided that I'm 32 years old and truthfully sick of all the crap that is still going on 14 years after high school ended. I get that everyone (and I mean everyone) has drama in their lives, but when you cause most of your own drama I have no sympathy. I am probably going to piss people off and I might even lose some friendships but if you can't handle my opinion of things than obviously we weren't friends to begin with. I AM NOT POINTING FINGERS at anyone I'm just stating things I see and it's a combination of years and years of frustration over some things. I will also limit the names I do use for I know they will not care that I've used them, but if I have not used a name, please respect the fact that I haven't used a name and don't mention any names. If you do, I will DELETE the comment.
For the record I am not perfect, hell I'm probably the farthest thing from it so don't think that with this blog I am saying I am perfect and everyone else is not. Let me explain things so everyone knows what is going on in this household, that way no one can say I'm passing judgement from my perfect palace.
Just because I don't talk about it or post it on facebook all the time doesn't mean I don't have my bad days. Since the twins came along I have struggled with a small bout of depression. I've never experienced this before and at first didn't understand what was going on. It took until just 4 or 5 months ago for me to come to terms with what is going on. Because we make a hair too much money for state assistance in insurance, but not enough to actually get insurance any other way, I am without it. So instead of borrowing money from my parents to go to the doctor, my fabulous husband and our friend Jacob, have taken on the brunt of my frustrations. They have held me up and held me tight through horrible crying fits that I thought I would surely break into a million pieces from. Remember please I am a strong person and for me this is unacceptable. I do everything I can to not have these in front of our children, because I do not want them to be effected by this in any way. I know that at least my oldest understand that I am going through something, but I do not think the little ones have a clue. I hope they don't anyways, please let me have my delusions. Now, where it has effected my children is the fact that I did not want to go anywhere and I did not want to do anything. I wanted to sit here and be in my own little bubble. The problem with this is that means I have no face to face time with adults. So I am with just my children all day every day. As most of you especially stay at home moms know, our job is 24/7 and is 365 days a year. There is no sick time, no vacations. So in combination with being depressed, slowly I was going insane too I think. Again all this was happening and I didn't understand it until about 4-5 months ago. Never in all that time did I think about ending my life or that of my children. I just wanted to scream and cry and be held by the people who love me most.
Now that we/I understand what I am going through we have been working to get me better and all this without the help of meds and doctors. (NOT BASHING ANYONE WHO IS ON MEDS OR GOES TO THE DOCTOR) Hopefully this will help you understand why I don't have the time or energy to deal with some of the crap I read, heard and seen on a daily bases.
So let us begin with my Soapbox:
1. If you complain there is never enough money and either you or your spouse or you and your spouse don't work (and there is no legitimate medical or mental reason for not working) get off your lazy ass and find a freaking job. I'm sorry it might not be your "DREAM" job, but GOOD LORD it's a damn job. So you are flipping burgers or working behind a counter at a gas station you are providing for yourself or your family. Get over yourself. When you have a family to feed and provide for NOTHING should be beneath you. So what if you have to work 2-3 jobs. You choose to have a family no get off your ass and provide for them. At the moment Daniel is not working his butt off at both jobs, but we've noticed that it looks like we need some income coming in from that 2nd job. So he will go back to working 45 hours or more at job 1 and than go to job 2 and work 20-40 hours there. Meaning we at the house wont see him. I'll be back to putting everyone to bed by myself most nights and doing shower time with just my oldest and I. It's gonna be tough, but we can do it. We will make it through this like we have everything else in life. Does Daniel want to do this, no. He enjoys spending time with his family, but he UNDERSTANDS what it means to take care of his family.
2. If you complain there is never enough money, but you are constantly going out or buying new things I have NO SYMPATHY for you. Ever once in a while splurging is one thing, but when you are going out 3-5 times a week or every weekend there is an issue. If you buy something that is wanted but not needed at that time and than don't have money for your bills, there is an issue. Again the every once in awhile splurging is different. If you don't have the money to put gas in your car at the end of the week, but you have been out and about ever day doing nothing but being out of the house, NO SYMPATHY. We grounded the van for a full week and a half and I went no where I didn't absolutely have to go because we knew we weren't gonna have the extra cash.
3. I'm not sorry for my opinion on this one, but sorry it may hurt feelings. If you put your schooling before you providing for your family. What I mean by this, is instead of working to provide for your family and doing school around that to better yourself. When because you are going to school full time the only income you are getting is from your loans and state assistance and you don't have enough money to feed your children, or pay your light bill or rent and you complain about it, I have NO SYMPATHY. I understand the need to better yourself, so you can provide better for your children. BUT, that should never come before making sure they are feed and provided for.
4. My oldest father is not in the picture, he lives in a different state and has had no face to face contact with him since he was 6 weeks old, no phone contact with him since he was 3-4 years old and no email/facebook/myspace, snail mail contact since he was probably 5 years old. No birthday or Christmas cards or presents since 3-4. Some months child support comes in, some months it doesn't. I don't ever count on that money though, because the minute I do I stop getting it. I try to spend 25% on things my oldest wants. The rest I use to help pay bills for the house or with sport activities. I have no need for my ex husband and I am sure he feels the same about me, but I NEVER BASH HIM in front of or around or where my oldest might see it. All it does is make you look like an idiot later in life. If your other parent is a first class loser, let your children find out on their own and just be there for them. Also never assume you know all the facts going on in your ex's life. They are an ex for a reason and your probably aren't involved in all the information.
5. If you have a parent (dad or mom) that wants to be involved in the kids life, unless there is a damn good reason let them be. No offense women, you have a dad that is willing to pay child support and willing to split custody and WANTS to spend time with their child(ren) why would you not let them? All that will cause if for your child later in life to realize that it is you that wouldn't let them go see their dad. Vice verse for Dad's with a mom (Though it's not nearly as common).
6. If you keep popping kids out and you can't afford or handle the ones you currently have, NO SYMPATHY! Get over yourselves. There are families out there that want children and can afford them, but can't have them. Here you are, 1,2,5,10 children later, living (not assisted) off the state and you can't figure out what causes it. USE A DAMN CONDOM OR GET SOME BIRTH CONTROL! Better yet get FIXED! After we had our 2nd child we decided Daniel would get fixed. Well the money was never there and I didn't know you could get help through the health clinic if you qualified for it. We decided that our income tax of 2011 would be used to make that happen. Well the big man upstairs decided that we weren't done and blessed us with our youngest two, the twins. Let me tell you something at 5 months pregnant Daniel went and snip snip we weren't having any more children. But I'd rather be safe than sorry so I went and had myself done also. If we get pregnant now there better a star in the sky and three wise men with lots of gold headed my way. NOW.... that being said, we currently have a friend who went in and did the same thing I did and hers didn't take. That is a different situation. I get some religions don't believe in Birth control of any type, well than understand that I hope the state stops helping you. I know that may be cruel, but up until our 2nd child I worked 40-60 hours a week and paid my taxes and did all that junk, I don't want to pay for you to sit on your butt because you have to many children and can't afford daycare now. I don't care what age you are either. If you can't afford or handle your current children, may you should think about getting fixed. Just saying.
7. Now to all you people that LIVE OFF OUR SYSTEM (if it isn't a valid reason) I'd like to smack the hell out of you! The system is there to help people. Now partially I blame the government because they've let it get this far. But mostly I blame the people that are to damn lazy to work. Please understand that we have/do and might have to again in the near future get food stamps and WIC and medicaid for the kids. But remember Daniel works 50-90 hours a week and we are still in need of assistance. There is the difference. I hope that they go to drug testing. I think it would do a lot of good. 90% of the work force has to pee in a cup to get a job, than we should have to pee in a cup to get the assistance. It should be completely random and it should be done while on assistance too. Just because you passed the one at application, doesn't mean anything. They should randomly call you and say you need to be here by 2pm today and if you don't show we suspend your assistance. Hello if you aren't working than you should be able to find your way up there to do this. Hello it's called a bus if you have no car.
8. I hate election years and especially this year. MY PERSONAL OPINION we are damned either way. I haven't decided if I'm gonna vote or not. I understand we have had many many men and women who have died to give me that right, but I also have the right to not vote. If I don't vote, THAN I HAVE NO RIGHT TO BITCH LATER! That goes for anyone. If you don't vote, don't bitch! If you are unable to vote because you are a felon still your fault don't bitch!
9. I have my own religious beliefs and the Big Man Upstairs and I talk on a pretty good basis. Just because I do not see something the same way you do doesn't mean I am wrong. Everyone comes away with what the Big Man wants them too. We could each read a Bible verse and God could work in 2 different ways to explain it to us, depending on what we have going on in our lives. Personally I think there is ONE GOD up there and everyone just worships him in different ways. If you don't believe in him at all, remember you still believe in that and that's something. I've heard two things lately that made me pause and I hope they make you pause too...
A. If your right and I'm wrong than I just believed something whole heartily and no harm no fowl. But, if I'm right and your wrong you burn in what ever eternal hell will happen.
B. To fight the whole if you can't see, touch or smell it, it isn't real. Can you touch your brain? Can you see your brain (machine seen doesn't count)? Can you smell it? Truthfully can you feel it? NO you can't. So does that mean it's not there? Family members that are overseas fighting for our country that we can't see, touch, sometimes hear... are they not real than? Food for thought. I'm not gonna get to much into this.
Just remember the Bible was written by man and while God is perfect Man is not. So who is to say that some of these things weren't written by a man on the rag having a bad week? Or the "Devil" had a hand on him. Lead a good life, help others and believe and personally I think you'll be fine. By a good life I don't mean perfect.
10. I try not to judge anyone without hearing their side first, but when all you do is moan and complain and whine about the WOE IS ME AND MY LIFE, I just don't have sympathy any more. If you aren't going to get off your butt and do something about it, don't complain about it.
Now that I have probably pissed some people off and made others wonder if they truly want to remain friends I'm going to close with this. If you are my friend than I want you to and I love each and everyone of you, but that doesn't mean I agree with all your bullshit and it doesn't mean I wont say things you aren't going to like. Remember I AM NOT PERFECT! I have done my fair share of things that I probably shouldn't have. But we learn from our mistakes. Sometimes it just takes more than one mistake. My blog may not be perfect and there are probably spelling errors and the wording might not be right, but there it is.
Be blessed all my friends and family in whatever you may do.
Tuesday, June 26, 2012
Wednesday, June 20, 2012
Motivational Wednesday
I found this and couldn't help but think how very true it is. May everyone be blessed!
Tuesday, June 19, 2012
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