A Son with a Heart of Gold

There are days that I sit here and wonder "What in the world was I thinking?  I moved across country to date a guy a barely knew and when that didn't work out I started dating another guy I barely knew and low and behold I married that one.  Again what in tarnasions was I thinking?"


Than Ethan pops into my head and everything makes perfect sense to me.  I may not know all the how's and why's, but I do know that God was working some heavy duty stuff on me at that time and I just didn't even know it.  I was meant to drive across the country.  I was meant to meet Ethan's biological father.  (For now I will not be using his name.  Some of my readers may know it and I ask that you not use it.  Thank you!)  I was meant to have a moment of stupidity when someone said, "Awe you two should get married!" after only knowing him a few months.  I was meant to nod my head and tell my parents that I knew this was right and this was what I wanted (When clearly he didn't get along with anyone important to me).  I was meant to go through everything else that happened (a blog later about it, maybe) from the time he and I got married until I called my mom in tears to tell her that I had a week and they were kicking me out of the apartment we lived in and I had no where to go and could I please come home.  My parents, God love them, drove from home to Everette, Washington in 24 hours I want to say (Straight through) to pick up my six week old son, Ethan and I and bring us home.  It was worth losing just about everything I owned to come home.  We packed up the 95'Ford Explorer I owned at the time and the back of my parents 1999-2001 Nissan Frontier and home we came.  I left the front door open and told a neighbor they could have whatever was left in there (couches, pots & pans, entertainments centers, beds).  I left it all behind because I knew that was not where I needed to raise my son.



With this wonderful roller coaster ride we call life that we all ride daily, sometimes the fun ride going down just plain sucks.  It was hard in the beginning.  Living at home again, Ethan and I in one room of my parents house.  We all know that I love my mother and would do anything for her, but we clash something fierce on a ton of subjects.  How to raise my son, was one of the biggest ones.  But we all survived it (though I don't plan on ever doing it again, especially since I know have 4 boys and a husband).  Ethan and I moved into our own apartment in the fall of 2006.  Ethan was 2 1/2 years old and cute as cute could be.  Even then I could tell living with my parents for just that long helped mold my son.  (We also lived with some friends and Da's influence helped also).  My son is/was polite and curtious.  He always wanted to help the wonderful lady across the lawn from us and the older (I mean probably older than dirt old) lady two apartments down.  He always made sure there was nothing in front of her walker for her to trip on.





In the fall/winter of 2007 I started to date my husband now and in March of 2010 Ethan helped us welcome his baby brother Peanut into the world.  (Not really, he wasn't watching or anything, but he was there right after.)  Something no parent wants to hear, especially a mom happened.  (No my son was not gone and for all those that have lost their angels I am very sorry and your pain is 10X's worse than mine will ever be and I pray for you all.)  My 15-20 minute old son was being taking from me and swept away to the NICU.  Now remember I said 15-20 minute old son, so the drugs still had not cleared my brain yet.  If it were not for the Fabulous Best friend Sharra Lynn they would have taken him away before I had even been able to see him.  He was okay, but they didn't like the way he was breathing so they wanted to evaluated him in the NICU.  My heart dropped and I didn't think I could breath.  They were taking my baby from me.  What did I do?  Did I do something wrong?  These were the thoughts in my head.  Let me tell you something, when you aren't prepared for something like that and it happens, your world is thrown upside down.  I'm not being mean when I say this, but if you've never experienced it please don't tell me you understand, because you don't.  Ethan being 6 years old was NOT ALLOWED in the NICU.  He saw his baby brother (for whom he prayed every night for 6 months straight for before finding out I was pregnant, and than 5 months that it was a boy and than another 3 months that he was healthy) for as long as we did in the room which was long enough for Sharra Lynn to snap two pictures and than Peanut was whisked away.




For those of you that don't know how NICU works, here at Sacred Heart (which in my OPINION is the best) you are allowed 4 people to come in out of the NICU besides you and your "spouse".  We chose our parents.  No one else got to meet him until he came home.  The feeling of leaving your child because you have been released was something I hoped I would never have to go through again.  Because 3 days after he was born I was released and he was there for another 4 days.  Now Please understand I am very greatfull and blessed he was only there for that short a period and I pray for those that have their children in there for months.





I tell you all of this because it will help you understand who Ethan is today.  In Feb of 2010 before we had Peanut the local radio station WXBM holds a 3 day long radiothon to raise money for the Women's and Children's Center at Sacred Heart.  Ethan and I were listening to this one day on the radio and a class from one of the local schools called in and said they had, had a Penny War and they were going to donate all of it to Sacred Heart.  My son asked what a Penny War was and I explained it to him.  He nodded and that was the end of it.  (If I haven't told you before Ethan can have the mind of an Elephant sometimes.)  Peanut was born March 30 of 2010 and a month later out of the blue Ethan looks at me and says, "Mom, do you think we can have a Penny War at school to raise money for the people that helped my baby brother." Even as I typed this I get tears in my eyes at my 6 year old having this idea.  I told him we would have to talk to his school Principle.  Now Ethan goes to a private school and after he pitched the idea to his Principle she said she would have to talk it over with some other people and would let us know.  Two weeks later she said that it was a wonderful idea to help teach the children to give to other people, but it would have to be the next school year.



In November 2010 with my son leading the way his school (only had 125 students, maybe) raised $1528.00 in nothing but penny's and silver change in 10 days.  They presented it the Sacred Heart Foundation to be used for the Children's outside area that was being remolded.  I was so proud of the school but most of all Ethan, because he is the one that had the idea to begin with.




Since than Ethan does everything he can to help out.  In Dec of 2010 we found out that we were going to have another baby.  In Jan of 2011 we found out that it was not one, but two.  Yes we were having twins.  Something I couldn't believe and was truly fearful about.  I'm not a small women by any means.  In fact I've been the same weight even with pregnancies for 3 or so years.  I heard so many horror stories about Bigger women having multiple children, not only more than one at a time but having more than one pregnancy.  So the thoughts running through my head were not good.  At that point in time in my life that while yes Ethan went to a Christian school, I myself was not a Christian.  I wasn't anything.  Days after finding out we were indeed having twins I was on the floor playing with Peanut and I just started to bawl.  I didn't know how I was going to be able to handle the pregnancy and having the children that close together.  I became a Christian that day (but that is for another blog that will be coming).  My husband and I prepared not only ourselves, but Ethan and everyone else that the boys (yes I have all boys) would be in the NICU for at least a month if not more depending on when I had them.  I went into labor the first time at 20-22 weeks.  They gave me some medicine and it stopped and I went home.  I went into labor again at 28 weeks and again they were able to stop it.  At 32 weeks I went into labor for the third and final time.  I started having labor pains around noon on Saturday (they were still hours apart at that time) and we arrived at the hospital around 2 am that night.  At 5am they admitted me and put me on magnisium hoping to stop it.  At 5am Monday morning it was decided that I was laboring through the magnisium and it was time.  At 6am Monday morning Killian and Malachi were born.  They were born at the same time since I had a C-Section.  (Again another story on both Peanut and the twins birth.)  We were prepared this time and my brand new babies were whisked away to the NICU.  They were there for roughly two weeks.  But I know God knew what he was doing by keeping them there.  It gave me time to heal and for us to finish preparing for their arrival.



Ethan has been my Knight and Shinning Armour through all of this.  He is my helper as well as having a heart of Gold.  Through all of this he still does everything he can to help out Sacred Heart and now that he understand the importance of what the Ronald McDonald House does with Sacred Heart he helps them as well.  Ethan and Daniel rode in the 2011 Ride for Miracle Camp for Sacred Heart and Ethan was even the one that said, "Ladies and Gentlemen please start your engines."  It was Awesome for him.  This year he was unable to ride in it because my husband's bike was down for repairs, but Ethan and I still made the trip up there so he could donate his money.












Ethan's school did not do another Penny War this year and he decided on his own that he would raise as much money as he could and would make his donation during the Radio-thon.  Ethan raised $500.00 on his own.  Many people donated to this worthy cause through him.  He said afterwards, "Mom, next year I think I can do a $1000.00."  So the goal has been set and off we've gone.  I do not know how much he has so far, but I do know there are people keeping their change for him and people of who have said they will donate again or for the first time time in 2013.  I am looking for a business that will match whatever his donation will be.



Recently though Ethan asked if there was anything other than collecting the soda pop tabs that he could do for Ronald McDonald House.  I sent an email off and received back many idea's for him.  The one Ethan Liked the best was a "WISH LIST DRIVE".  Each month RMH has a wish list of things they need.  If you don't know what the RMH does, please let me explain.  If your child for some reason is whisked away and brought to the Nemours clinic here or to Sacred Heart itself, than parents can ask the RMH to allow them to stay there.  Some of these parents are not prepared for this because it was an Oh My Flipping Gosh moment and they have nothing.  Not even a tooth brush.  RMH will provide them with what ever they can.  So on Sunday May 6, 2012 Ethan is starting a RMH Wish List Drive and will hold it for a week, until Sunday May 13, 2012.  Everything will than be taken to the RMH on Monday May 14, 2012 and given to them.  He has also asked if he can help my Sunday School class the next time they cook a meal for the RMH (which we do once a month).

I do not know what the summer holds for Ethan, but I know it will be great.  We are currently collecting glass bottle tops because he's going to turn them into magnets to sell in Sept/Oct to raise money for his donation in Feb/March for the Radio-thon.  I will tell you now, if you have the crazy eyes and multi colored fuzzy wire or colored whole things we will be using these to make his magnets and any donations of those will be greatly appreciated.



For now I think I've babbled your ears off my faithful (or new) readers.  I know there was a lot of background but I needed you to understand when and where this all started.  If you would like to help Ethan with his donation please contact me.  Also if you would like to make a donation straight to either of these worthy organizations contact either the Northwest Florida Ronald McDonald House or Bambie Provost at Sacred Heart's Foundation Department.


I am attaching the wish list.

Thank you everyone!